Why I love fashion

Tanya Gold is a peculiar woman. On one hand, she can write witty little wisecracks about the the liberating pleasures of living by oneself (exhibit A - "I am a snoring, farting walrus/wildebeest-type creature, lying on melted chocolate buttons with a copy of Hello! scrunched between my thighs") and the difficulty of letting a man into this space (exhibit B - "Sleeping next to Man, I feel threatened. I have awoken to find myself punching people in the face"). And yet it appears she is also capable of throwing together some absolute tosh.

Case in point: a piece that was published in Thursday's copy of The Guardian, entitled 'Why I Hate Fashion' http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/22/i-hate-fashion-tanya-gold (exhibit C).

To summarise, the points Miss Gold makes:
1) Fashion is elitist, unaccessible, and purely there for profit.
2) Fashion was responsible for the death of a 16-year-old girl in West Sussex.
3) Fashion made one 16-year-old model miserable.
4) Fashion decrys Tanya's new-found weight, and has kicked her out of its exclusive club.

There is a lot wrong with the fashion industry, but Tanya Gold must surely be the true definition of a 'fashion victim'. It annoys me how so many people are snobbish about an industry that is founded upon everyday life and a wealth of creativity.

The tale of the two girls is silly and short-sighted. The true beauty of fashion is that it is (secretly, it seems) anti-elitist, expressive and available for all bodies and builds. It might be there for profit, but at the end of the day so are all commodities, and when you're living in these items day-in and day-out, surely they must be seen as investments? Fashion is one of the most open clubs in town; it's your own fault if decide not to step through the door.

The best bit, however, in all of this is the picture.

I mean, OH MY. I wheezed.
Can you imagine the photographer? "What we've gone for here is a unique take on the Lily Allen 2006 look, teaming a khaki ocean with some very chic Primark trainers; it shall be called bag-lady. Right, now that's it, hunch over a little more. Let's try again, but can you look a little bit more shit darling...?"

(You may also notice Tanya look decidedly more glamorous for the contributor image on the Guardian's website...)

Those mannequins are brilliant however, filled with a venomous disgust of what has fallen before them. The only thing that can save Tanya Gold now is if one of the mannequins (or both, if they so wish) would do her the courtesy of stepping out of the window and providing her with a quick wallop about the face with a Chanel handbag, or a fast jab to the knee with a Wang heel.