Pyjama-rama

Apparantly it's not limited to a selective few oddballs. It's not even an act that is considered embarrassing. In fact, it's supposedly becoming a national phenomenon. I'm referring to Britain's movement towards a more pyjama proud populus - specifically in the aisles of our fruits and veg. Supermarkets have had to explicity state on signs outside their doors that customers must be wearing appropriate dress and footwear, i.e. not your slips and nightgown. Some customers have remarked that those who shop in their loungewear cause them to be "embarrassed" and "offended".

I can't decide what to make of this. On the one hand, the image of myself doing the weekly shop in my pyjama top and bottoms causes my face to screw up in dread and I can't suppress the instinctive reaction to snort in derision. But I also can't help but enjoy the fact that people feel comfortable enough with what they are wearing (albeit not much) to go out in public like this. To be honest, with the recent surge in popularity of those grey trackie bottoms that every man and his dog seem to be wearing, coupled with the resilience of the fuggin' ugg boot, it's not suprising that we're taking things back to basic. Emphasis on casual comfort and... wearing what you sleep in? Perhaps this is a new market the fashion industry can tap into a little more. It's the only item of clothing that's still not produced in any manner that can really be considered 'high fashion', isn't it? Hell, if Britain is known for its multi-culturalism, perhaps it can be known for its 'multi-couturism' too...?

Walk this way

I really will go to one of these someday.

As usual in times of panic (I have my first NCTJ exam tomorrow), I decide to turn to pretty things. There's been a buzz on the net over the recent Paris and Milan fashion weeks, so I thought I'd casually cast my critical eye over what the designers were offering up this time round.

In my extremely unprofessional view, three designers stood out: Prada, Rick Owens and Hermes. Prada showed in Milan, with a collection that possessed a classic masculinity, with sharp lines and defined silhouettes, that still sneaked in some mottled knitwear in jaded bubblegum and arctic blues. The short, quite feminine cut and fit of the knitwear worked really well with the tailored trousers and suit jackets. Following Burberry's lead, the outerwear also seemed to over-exaggerate the collar, with the snow white coat being my favourite.

In the opposite direction was Rick Owens' collection. A brave cross between mythical drapes and forward-thinking shapes and lines, the designer's showing was a simple palette of blacks and whites, with some fur and snakeskin thrown in to liven things up a bit. The beastial 'coat' and smooth minimalist black jacket with the belt over the top are eye-catching but understated. It's a look that might not be to everyone's taste, but it has some kind of dream-like hold over me everytime I glance at it. And check out those gloves!

And finally, Hermes presented a look that is, in contrast to Owens, very wearable and durable. There are flashes of flamboyancy with long scarves perfectly placed and sorbet red velvet trousers, but the basics remain quite simple. However, the fact that one model manages to wear a parka jacket and still retain his credibility deserves immediate applause. The metallic mac is also a winner.

What do you think? All pictures are courtesy of GQ.

Sign of The Times

The Times is reportedly in discussions over ending the daily features pull-out, Times2. Apparantly the idea is to simply incorporate the features into the main body of the paper, but the redesign might mean that more space is given to its football supplement The Game and the weekly property section Bricks & Mortar.

This cannot be allowed. Denying readers of the features pull-out renders the whole process of reading a newspaper completely redundant. Why else would I wade through endless atrocities and disasters - for a bloody football?! I think not. It's like missing out on the sweet and being left with the sour; the ying without the yang, if you will. And particularly with news being so freely available on the internet, it is a serious error to suppose we need more print space for it. Nor do we need to surrender the supplement for further coverage of football or property developments; we have Sky Sports News and Kirstie and Phil for that.

And please do not suggest that The One Show is an adequate replacement for my Times2 fix...

Why I love fashion

Tanya Gold is a peculiar woman. On one hand, she can write witty little wisecracks about the the liberating pleasures of living by oneself (exhibit A - "I am a snoring, farting walrus/wildebeest-type creature, lying on melted chocolate buttons with a copy of Hello! scrunched between my thighs") and the difficulty of letting a man into this space (exhibit B - "Sleeping next to Man, I feel threatened. I have awoken to find myself punching people in the face"). And yet it appears she is also capable of throwing together some absolute tosh.

Case in point: a piece that was published in Thursday's copy of The Guardian, entitled 'Why I Hate Fashion' http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/22/i-hate-fashion-tanya-gold (exhibit C).

To summarise, the points Miss Gold makes:
1) Fashion is elitist, unaccessible, and purely there for profit.
2) Fashion was responsible for the death of a 16-year-old girl in West Sussex.
3) Fashion made one 16-year-old model miserable.
4) Fashion decrys Tanya's new-found weight, and has kicked her out of its exclusive club.

There is a lot wrong with the fashion industry, but Tanya Gold must surely be the true definition of a 'fashion victim'. It annoys me how so many people are snobbish about an industry that is founded upon everyday life and a wealth of creativity.

The tale of the two girls is silly and short-sighted. The true beauty of fashion is that it is (secretly, it seems) anti-elitist, expressive and available for all bodies and builds. It might be there for profit, but at the end of the day so are all commodities, and when you're living in these items day-in and day-out, surely they must be seen as investments? Fashion is one of the most open clubs in town; it's your own fault if decide not to step through the door.

The best bit, however, in all of this is the picture.

I mean, OH MY. I wheezed.
Can you imagine the photographer? "What we've gone for here is a unique take on the Lily Allen 2006 look, teaming a khaki ocean with some very chic Primark trainers; it shall be called bag-lady. Right, now that's it, hunch over a little more. Let's try again, but can you look a little bit more shit darling...?"

(You may also notice Tanya look decidedly more glamorous for the contributor image on the Guardian's website...)

Those mannequins are brilliant however, filled with a venomous disgust of what has fallen before them. The only thing that can save Tanya Gold now is if one of the mannequins (or both, if they so wish) would do her the courtesy of stepping out of the window and providing her with a quick wallop about the face with a Chanel handbag, or a fast jab to the knee with a Wang heel.

50s pornstar at the gym

How do you know I don't mean the 2050s?

Shortbodies

If only shorthand was taught like this...

'James'
It's my name, don't wear it out. For some unknown reason Blogger has reverted the image back to its original formatting and won't let me flip it, so you'll have to make do with craning your necks 90 degrees to the right.
No socks were harmed in the making of this art.

'Amy'

A perfect example of 'y' saying 'i', this is the wonderful Amy Stocking, poet extraordinaire and mystic temptress of the Black Country. You can read her work and musings on life by clicking here: http://showponytrot.blogspot.com/

An almighty bigot

I finally got round to watching Australia, Baz Luhrman's fourth masterpiece. I know, I know, I'm late to the party as usual (fashionably late mind... I was wearing the speckled trousers), but there's no excuse for it. Ultimately uplifting and a true tale of what it means to come 'home', Luhrman's spectacle is astounding. I genuinely do believe there's no other director quite like him around today.

At the end of the film, we are told that the Australian government 'officially abandoned the assimilation policy for indigenous Australians in the northern territory in 1973'.

How is it that a four-digit fact can be so harrowing?

Then, as I turn off the DVD player and BBC news pops up on screen, a story is being ran about Iris Robinson, the wife of Northern Ireland's First Minister Peter Robinson, telling of how she had admitted last night that she had tried to kill herself after confessing to her husband that she had had an affair. This is the same woman who claims homosexuality is, I quote, an "abomination", something that makes her feel quite "sick" and "nauseous". As right-thinking members of society condemned this vile woman for her remarks, her husband rushed to her defence, saying:

"It wasn't Iris Robinson who determined that homosexuality was an abomination, it was The Almighty. This is the Scriptures and it is a strange world indeed where somebody on the one hand talks about equality, but won't allow Christians to have the equality, the right to speak, the right to express their views."

This is ignorance at its finest. Sometimes this world is so fast-moving that I temporarily forget these kind of views are still held, and that it's only been 37 years since the atrocities against those of mixed race ended in Australia. The fact that someone like Iris Robinson is a figurehead for a state like Northern Ireland...? It's beyond comprehension.

I wonder what The Almighty has to say about adultery and suicide, eh Iris?

Speckled hen

It's long been common knowledge that guys have always been far more limited than gals when it comes to clothing design. If you venture out to buy a top, you can guarantee it'll either be a plain colour, striped or checked. That or, heaven forbid, it'll have one of those soul-diminishing slogans that proudly reads "please return to the bar" (or something).

But my dear whipper-snappers, do not despair! For I have recently discovered a surge of what can only be described as 'speckled' items entering the marketplace. Subtle, and yet full of big old impact, I find this new style really interesting because of the effect it can have on an outfit as a whole. The effect is one of slap-dash "couldn't-care-less" attitude, with the pattern looking quite distressed and worn, and I think, if put together correctly, it can bring a really different feel to an outfit.

These are a few of my favourite pieces that I've spotted.

The problem with this 'speckled' design pattern is that the detail can be so minute that you may not be able to tell from the photo what I'm even spouting about...! These are in the Topman sale for only £25 (I snatched some up the other week) and they're from the shop's "Ltd" collection, which I suppose must hint at higher quality... The charcoal colour is pretty versatile, and even though they're dressed on the model with a shirt, I've been wearing them more as casual trousers, with hi-top trainers or big old brown leather boots. The trousers immediately smarten an outfit up, but because of the speckled print they still retain this casual, quickly-put-together image.

http://www.topman.co.uk/

Another piece currently at a reduced price (I found it in an Urban Outfitters store), but at over £100 it's still quite pricey. This woollen cardigan by APC is grey, but because of the multi-coloured speckled effect it has splashed across it, in navy blues and deep reds (amongst others), the colouring of it is unique. I even think it gives off a pink kind of hue. The mannequin wearing it on the website has the cardigan fitted with a pale blue shirt underneath, but if you're a slim shady character like me, then I think it works well if the cardigan is slightly over-sized.

http://www.oipolloi.com/